


Unexpectedly

by colazitron



Category: SKAM (Norway)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Childhood Friends, Fluff, Getting Together, M/M, just a tiny little breeze of angst in the beginning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-19
Updated: 2019-06-19
Packaged: 2020-05-14 23:02:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,525
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19283005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/colazitron/pseuds/colazitron
Summary: Even and Isak are finally on a date and Isak's pretty sure he hasn't been breathing right all evening.





	Unexpectedly

**Author's Note:**

  * For [nofeartina](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nofeartina/gifts).



> **A/N:** for Tina who asked "Blurting out a confession of love" + "I’ve been in love with you for years."

Even shifts where he's sitting next to Isak – close, closer than they've been all night – in the giant, blue ring that probably symbolises something Isak doesn't know anything about, and then sighs. His gaze flits away from where he'd been looking at Isak to look out over the park, and then down at this shoes.

Isak's heart beats heavily in his chest.

“I'm sorry. Maybe this was a bad idea. We don't have to...” Even says quietly, letting the rest of his sentence get lost in the vague gesture of one of his hands.

He's still not looking at Isak, and Isak's heart is drumming up a storm. He tries swallowing the tightness in his throat, but all it does is feed the panic growing in his stomach.

Oh god. He can't-- this can't be _it_. He can't let this be the end of things. There has to be a way to fix this.

“Why do you think it's a bad idea?” he asks, his own voice coming out a little hoarse. He doesn't even want to know what kind of expression he's wearing, because he can feel the tightness of his jaw, the way his eyes are pulled wide. It's taking all of his self-control not to hold his ice cream cone so tightly he crushes it in his fist, and he tries to pull himself together, tries to pull on a friendly smile, but he doesn't think he quite succeeds before Even looks up to look at him again.

Even looks at him and there's a sweet, sad little smile on his face.

His beautiful face.

Isak doesn't remember a time when he hasn't loved Even, in some way, shape, or form. He can't say that it's always been _this._ For one, because he's quite certain five year old Isak didn't think quite so much about the pink of Even's lips and the slope of his shoulders. He was more preoccupied with how Even could teach him letters and how he always came up with the very best games to play in the gardens behind their houses. Fif _teen_ year old Isak definitely started noticing the pink of Even's lips and the slope of his shoulders, but he didn't know how to love the way Even chews on the ends of his pen, the way he hums to himself when choosing a flavour of tea as though it's a vitally important decision, the way his brilliant smile makes Isak feel lighter than air.

He loved Even plainly when they were children who spent almost every afternoon together. He loved Even curiously when they were teenagers and Even didn't have time for him anymore. He loved Even desperately when he went to Elvebakken and he loved him painfully when Isak himself decided not to follow him there and go to Nissen with Jonas and Eva instead. He has loved Even in all the ways a boy can love another, and if it were up to him, he'd learn a new way to love him every day until the day he dies.

That isn't to say he hasn't seen other people. He's had a few short-lived boyfriends and a number of hook-ups, but in the end there was always one very important thing that stood out to him as to why it wouldn't work with them: they weren't Even.

Even, who dated his first girlfriend for four years and his first boyfriend for two after that. Even, who looked at Isak like a little brother at best, a nuisance at worst – until that magical day a week ago when he'd sighed almost like he did now and asked Isak if he maybe wanted to go on a date with him. Just something casual to see if there's anything there between them.

Isak's pinched himself so much since then he wouldn't be surprised if he's bruised himself.

Even sighs again.

“I just don't feel like you're having a good time,” Even says and blushes as he mumbles out his next words. “If you're not into me… I can take the rejection, Isak. We'll still be friends. You don't have to do this just for me.”

“For you,” Isak parrots, feeling struck dumb.

Truth be told, Isak's not having a good time. His heart has been hammering away in his chest ever since he's left the flat he shares with Jonas and no matter how hard he tries, he can't swallow the frog sitting in his throat, making it hard to speak. It's usually so easy to talk to Even, even in the most despairing depths of his teenage crush on Even it's been easier to talk to him than tonight.

Isak changed eight times before he left the house and he's never felt less comfortable in his skin. Everything feels wrong – his clothes, his hair, his fucking _joints_. None of it feels like enough, like it could convince Even to turn this into something more than casual. To convince him to give Isak a real chance.

He feels like he's been holding his breath all evening, waiting for the moment when Even would gently tell him he was wrong, that this isn't going to work. And somehow Even thinks that Isak is the one doing Even a favour, indulging him in something he doesn't get anything out of in return. Isak's sure that makes sense, if you look at it from Even's point of view, but it's so absurd that it startles a laugh out of him.

“Even, I've been in love with you for years,” he says before his mind can catch up with the words tumbling out of his mouth.

Even's face falls into an expression of complete surprise, and Isak is pretty sure he actually stops breathing for a few moments.

“You have?” Even asks. He speaks quietly, like he doesn't want to shatter whatever fragile thing has been hanging in the air between them all evening. Isak's pretty sure that fragile thing is his heart trying leap out of his mouth into Even's open palms.

He shrugs.

“Yeah,” he says. “I don't know when it started. It feels like it's just always sort of been there. I figured out I liked guys and then I figured out I liked you and it never really went away.”

Isak keeps looking at Even, waiting for the expression on his face to change, until Even runs a hand over his face and turns to stare out over the park again. Then Isak blushes and looks down at his shoes.

Fuck.

His ice cream is melting too.

“That's a lot,” Even says, and this time when Isak looks over at him, he's meeting his gaze again, though the expression on his face is unreadable.

Isak sighs.

“Yeah. Sorry. I didn't mean to dump that on you.”

Even shakes his head. “No, I just mean… that's a lot to live up to.”

Isak stares at Even and finally recognises the insecurity in his eyes, the way he pulls back when he's afraid.

Carefully, Isak reaches out his ice-cream-less hand and curls it around Even's forearm. “Not to make it worse, but you've been my childhood protector and my teenage fantasy and my best friend through all of that. I don't think you could disappoint me if you tried.”

Even huffs a sound that might be a laugh and looks down at Isak's hand on his arm and then back up at him.

“You can't know that,” he says.

Isak shrugs. “No, but I can make an educated guess.”

It pulls a smile onto Even's face like he can't help it, and he ducks his head for a moment before twisting his arm under Isak's hold so he can slip his hand into Isak's instead. Palm to palm, fingers curled around each other.

“So… not a bad idea?”

“No, not at all,” Isak says. “I'm just so nervous. I don't think I can do casual when it comes to this.”

“Casual is all you've been doing. I thought you might not want more,” Even says, looking at Isak curiously, like he can guess at Isak's reason even before Isak tells him.

Isak shrugs.

“None of them were you,” he says, and then does go back to his ice cream, leaving Even to process.

“It hasn't been always for me,” Even says finally. “But it has been a few months now. It's not casual for me either.”

Isak's heart picks up speed again, his cheeks probably flushing red with pleasure at the thought that Even has been thinking about him. Has been _wanting_ him.

He finishes his ice cream and squeezes Even's hand.

“Okay. That's good,” he says.

Even squeezes his hand back and smiles at him, smile brighter than the setting sun and eyes crinkled into half-moons more sparkly than the first stars overhead.

“Yeah?”

Isak licks the remaining ice cream off his lips and nods, watching the way Even's gaze follows the movement.

“Yeah,” he says and pulls on Even's arm. He tastes like chocolate ice cream when they kiss and Isak feels like he can breathe again. This isn't a bad idea at all.

 

**The End**


End file.
